I'll never forget the Hanukkah I spent with my college boyfriend. His family was a colorful cast of characters on a normal day, so wine-fueled, they were . . . extra.

That's why it isn't surprising that before dinner even started, my bf's step-dad Steve, a sharp-tongued know-it-all, had jumped onto the bench we were sitting on, the better to bellow in his daughter's face about how animated Disney films should not be nominated for Oscars!

I snickered behind my napkin because this was amazing.

And because I was high.

My boyfriend and his best friend, Wei - also in attendance that night - were ganja aficionados. Therefore, it made perfect sense to them to get mind-meltingly high before dinner. I was still new to acting autonomously in the presence of elders, though, so for me, being high was both thrilling - and terrifying.

In the kitchen, my bf's mother, Molly, was earnestly flinging herself about, uttering comical little grunts as she ricocheted off the stainless steel surfaces. I've never loved the visual of a chicken running around with its head cut off; that's why when I hear this phrase, I always picture Molly doing this instead.

Grandma was seated at the table, too, but she only had one good ear, and next to that ear was Charlie, five years old and feeding off the hysterical energy being emitted from the three of us who'd "gone for a walk" before dinner. He was giggling uncontrollably himself, loudly shouting at Grandma whatever inappropriate things Wei whispered to him.

Steve had gone back to sitting but was still bellowing, so Wei was getting progressively more daring with his prompts for Charlie, to my unhinged delight.

At the precise moment that Charlie shouted, "GRANDMA, THIS TASTES LIKE ASS!!" Molly came catapulting toward the dining room table with a giant roasting pan of brisket, stopping far too abruptly and causing a tidal wave of hot meat juice to cascade directly into Steve's lap.

That's around the time when I peed.

🤣🤣🤣

Listen Reader, I love me some chaos in the name of a good story.

But I also get if the chaos you experience this time of year is not of the LOL variety.

If this time of year is hard for you, I hope that mayhem👆🏼👆🏼 brought you a smile.

And also, I made you something.

It's the "How Not to Strangle Aunt Edna When She Asks, AGAIN, When You're Going to Have Kids" episode.

It's full of really useful suggestions - if I do say so - for introverts, empaths, highly sensitive people and anyone who's allergic to hassle.

It also comes complete with a Holiday Survival Guide made by yours truly and guaranteed to prevent "acting like a Molly."